Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Cloudy with a chance of clarity.

Every now and again I start to get this feeling. The sort of feeling that makes you want to run skywards for miles, or start collecting globes of different sizes. It starts with melancholia. My bubbly personality (am I the only one who cracks up at the thought of a person being bubbly?) begins to settle into this eerie, calm phase. I begin to think deeply about random things and begin to pine for something. I never know what that something is. A longing feeling, like there's something I'm forgetting to do, or some big part of life's picture that I'm overlooking. For me, this usually means I'm enterring a new "season" in life. As things that seemed important become less and less so, new things occupy my life. I'm a the point in life where things change very often and very quickly. It's called your 20s. Life feels like a roller-coaster and honestly, if it were any other way I'd be awfully bored.

So I come to terms with this new season in life, and then begin to get stressed. It's one thing to take a hold of a particular concern and lay it down, refusing to worry about it, saying "I will trust that God will work everything out". It's another thing when there is no particular concern. When it seems like the worry is about your entire life. That's what it feels like every time I enter a new season in life. I'm still riding on a high cloud from the end of the last season, when I've figured things out and am doing well. I'm wary about starting from the bottom, heading into something that is unfamiliar, that I don't know how to handle. If I pray at these times, I'll remember some scripture that relates to how I feel and read it. Today's was from Psalm 68. It says "Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.

Ah... right, OK. I can breathe. I remember now, God's still in control.
Just because I'm over 20 doesn't mean that I'm no longer God's child, doesn't mean that He has suddenly changed His mind about taking care of me, and handed over the responsibility for my life. He still believes that I shouldn't worry about my life. He's still got this.

And the God that's in control bears my burdens every day. As new ones come, He opens wide His everlasting arms and carries them. Whether I decide to be stressed or not, the truth is still the same. God is the only one that is actually sustaining me. "Cast your burden upon the Lord" king David said. Why? Because He's strong enough to take care of it, and He wants to. Because He cares for you.

Thus I chill out, and keep moving through life with a new thought in my head: "new season, same God."